Know what (WHO) you’re FOR

I am for people – and I am for them one at a time.

It’s really that simple.

I don’t care if you are an anonymous person in a chat room, a cashier at a grocery store, a homeless man on the interstate ramp, a frazzled single mom, a rebellious teenager, a Fortune 500 CEO, or a potential homebuyer in Knoxville. No matter who you are, what your story is or where you are headed, I am FOR you.

While I’ve always been about helping people and loving people well, I haven’t always known what I was for. In fact, it was just in the last few years that I was able to put my heart under a microscope and find out that the thing that fuels me is people and their stories.

And to take it a step further, it’s to see people owning their stories. Stories are the heart of every great thing happening around us. Stories are the mirrors we have to reflect God’s goodness to the world. Stories are how we connect with others. Stories are the tools we have to leave our mark in the world.

When I learned what (or in my case, who) I was for, everything else got easier. Way easier. I stopped having to chase someone else’s purpose and I started falling into mine. Knowing that I am for people and their stories changed the way I do every single thing in my life.

It’s why I work so hard to help people own their stories. Because I believe that owning your story allows you to live in confidence for your purpose.

So what are you for? Who are you for? Maybe you owning your story and living in confidence is about being FOR the people in your house. Or maybe you are for a group of high school football players. Or maybe you are for the people of your company, neighborhood, team, church, city, state, country or the world.

It really doesn’t matter. But no matter who you are or what you do/want to do, the first thing you have to do is find out who or what you’re for.

I’m going to help you out. If you can’t figure this out on your own, find out what people think you’re for. It’s not hard. Just ask them.

“When you think of me, what do you think I’m about?”

Here’s a hint.

If the answer is “yourself” or “I don’t know,” you should fix that really fast.

It doesn’t matter what you want to be about or what you think about yourself. If people think you are all about yourself and for yourself, they won’t trust you. Your kids won’t trust your. Your clients won’t trust you. Your players won’t trust you.

When you are for other people, you earn their trust and respect. And that’s priceless.

If you have to tell people what you are for and try to manipulate them into believing you, you’re just smoke and mirrors.

Know what you’re for. And then put it in front of you. On your phone, mirror, desk, dash, fridge. I don’t care – just plaster it in front of you everywhere you can. And every single decision you make should run through that filter.

For more on the idea of knowing what you’re for, you should definitely read Jeff Henderson’s book on the subject. It’s seriously one of the best business books I’ve ever read but really – it’s just a really great read for anyone!

If you found this to be helpful, head over and opt in to the Carter, Confidence & Coaching community, and then invite your friends to join in too. You’ll get weekly coaching emails dripping with value that people pay big money for. And for a (very) limited time, you can get in 100% FREE!

COVID-19 and Confidence

Just in case you weren’t aware, the news of Coronavirus is taking over the world. Nobody who is alive today has ever seen anything like what we are experiencing as the human race right now. COVID-19 doesn’t care what country you’re from, who you worship, how much money or fame you have or who your friends are.

Like many of you, I have spent the last few days trying to wrap my head around what I’m experiencing – both internally and externally. Everywhere I look, people are freaking out and social-distancing. Businesses are shutting down. Churches and schools are creating online environments.

What you believe about the virus and the widespread panic that is keeping us all on edge is critical to your emotional and mental health. What you are focused on will grow. If you’re submersed in the news and social media, you’re likely drowning in depression and anxiety. You’re wondering what to believe. How bad is it? Am I safe? Is my family safe? Will I know someone who is infected?

Will I lose my job? Will my company survive this? Will the economy come back? Can I feed my kids? Will life ever be the same again?

Can I encourage you, friends?

Just stop.

Focus on something positive.

If you’re working from home and your kids are out of school, you just got an extra 40 hours a week to spend with your kids. That’s a lot of opportunity to make up for some of the nights you’ve worked late and sent them to bed without even having a single genuine conversation with them in a day.

If you are usually so busy that you can’t see straight with activities, maybe this is an opportunity for you to slow down and focus on a few great things instead of a lot of good things.

Take this time to be grateful for all you have. Look around your life. Be grateful for your home, family, friends, job, etc. A song of gratitude drowns out the lies of anxiety and desperation.

Take this opportunity to do or learn something new. Read a book. Try an at-home exercise plan. Cook more. Find a new podcast. Declutter your house. Garden. Learn a new language. Play an instrument. Write a blog. Invent a new system for your work. Research a new topic. Paint a picture.

Instead of looking for the big bad scary news, look for stories of people doing good. Look for businesses that are helping the elderly. Look for individuals who are loving on their neighbors. Look for kids who are learning more than they will ever learn in the classroom. Look for stories of people recovering from the virus.

Spend time with Jesus in prayer and worship. If you’re so scared you can’t worship Him, sit in His presence and let Him love you. Worship and prayer are the ways we battle storms. Just because the church doors are closed doesn’t mean church is cancelled. Jump on and watch church online. If your church doesn’t have online services right now, you can join me at We are even doing daily prayer and worship segments twice a day this week to help break up the isolation and anxiety we are all facing right now.

Here’s a few thoughts I have about common conversations surrounding COVID-19:

  • No matter what side of this you’re on, you know there’s some politics behind it. It’s okay. That doesn’t mean the virus isn’t real.
  • Taking precaution for you and your family doesn’t make you weak or crazy. It makes you wise. Just don’t let fear rule you.
  • Nobody knows what tomorrow brings. The most important virtues in all of this are patience and kindness. Just because something hasn’t happened today doesn’t mean it won’t tomorrow. You are not an expert. Stop arguing with everyone about what is or isn’t going to happen.
  • No matter what industry you are in, the economy WILL come back. The world is not ending. This is not vacation. This is an opportunity to dig in and prove you have what it takes, even when times get tough.
  • Live and let live. We are all dealing with this crisis in our own ways. The way you are responding isn’t right or wrong, but neither is anyone else’s. You do you and let other people do what they need to do.

The people closest to me are either in shock or admiration with how I am dealing with the virus. I am living my life as usual. I have absolutely zero fear. I don’t say that out of arrogance or foolishness. I am aware of the risk. I am also aware that the same God who created me and you knows everything about yesterday, today and tomorrow. If I get the virus, He already knows it is going to happen and how it is going to go. That doesn’t mean I am hanging out at the mall or not washing my hands. It means I’m sleeping well at night and not stressing over what COULD happen. It means I am trusting that no matter what happens to our world or to me personally, God is still in control. One hundred percent.

In other words, I am operating from total confidence.

Do you want to use this time efficiently and pursue some dream deep in your heart but you need someone to help guide you along that process? I want to help you approach this season with a sense of stability and focus in a world that is screaming otherwise. Reach out to me at and let’s set up a consultation. I have room for three new clients right now – and I’m giving one-month packages away for FREE because I know some of you need someone to believe in you more than you believe in yourself right now AND I BELIEVE IN YOU!

Drop me a comment and tell me what your goals are for this season of uncertainty.

The Lord prepares a table for me in the presence of my enemies.

About a year ago, I was right in the middle of a completely unfair circumstance. It was one of those rare moments in time when I actually didn’t do anything wrong, yet I was getting hit on every side.

This wasn’t a TV show. It wasn’t a novel. There wasn’t some genius storyline behind the drama. It was my real life. And if I’m honest, it sucked.

It was really difficult to not focus on all the ways life was beating me up. I was getting screwed. I was losing money, relationships, opportunities and respect by no fault of my own. And somehow, I was inevitably the villain.

I lost my job and my best friend. Then I fell to the ground one night and in a matter of days, I lost my health too.

I won’t lie. I was losing faith. Quick.

Then a friend got my attention one day. He reminded me that the Lord was preparing a table for me IN THE PRESENCE of my enemies.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You have anointed my head with oil; My cup overflows.

– Psalms 23:5 NASB

That was a truth I clung to for…well, I’m still clinging to it. For months, it felt like an empty promise as nothing changed. In fact, things got worse in the natural.

But every time I would start to go down the wrong road, I would try to remember to focus on the feast my Heavenly Father was preparing for me rather than the audience watching. I had this visual in my head of sitting at a table on a stage where the Lord was standing and preparing the finest details of an elaborate meal and I was turned away from the table staring at the audience. I was completely missing the point of the show.

Can I tell you why?

Because I’m an Enneagram 3. We like stages because of the audience, not the show. In my illustration, all I’m focused on is what the audience thinks of me. I’m missing that Jesus has a better show than I do.

Thankfully I have a crew that keeps me on track, and a Jesus who keeps improvising His way through my missteps.

I built a habit out of turning away from the audience and putting my feet under the table and watching intently as God continues to prepare a table for me. The more I force myself to make that movement, the more natural it becomes.

Actually, now I just sit with my elbows on the table and my face in my palms as I watch Him do what He does best.

I have the best job I’ve ever had. And I’m good at it.

I’m surrounded by super cool people who help sharpen me and build me up for the kingdom work I’m doing.

I am in love with the role I get to play in the stories my church facilitates for Jesus.

I am healthier and stronger than I’ve probably ever been.

I’m closer to my dreams.

I’m living my very best life.

See? When we let our Lord be the show and captivate the audience, it takes all the pressure off of us. We get to just rest at His table that He intentionally prepared for us.

He not only provided for me in a season of lack. He actually replenished everything the enemy stole from me and blessed me exponentially in the process.

I went from paying my bills to paying my bills, saving, giving, paying off debt and investing.

I went from a job where I was capped out to a career in an industry I love with unlimited growth and income potential.

I went from being a chronically scaled Crossfit athlete to a thriving runner and athlete getting coached by the best.

I went from serving for my church in a role where I had become as good as I was ever going to get to a new role in a new capacity that allows me to grow, develop and use my God-given gifts to make a real difference in the hearts and lives of those I touch.

I am the closest I’ve ever been to seeing my blood, sweat and tears on real pages sitting on bookshelves all over America – and the book tour of course!

I went from being able to see less than 50 percent out of both eyes combined to now being able to see 100 percent out of both eyes, and we are starting to talk about the possibility of driving again.

I could go on….but you get the idea. The God of the universe knows what He is doing. Instead of us being so focused on the audience – the enemy – we have got to gaze at God and glance at life.

All I want is all you’ve got.

In John 2, Jesus asked servants to fill water pots at a wedding that was out of wine. They filled six water pots up with water TO THE BRIM. Once they were finished, He turned their water into the finest wine of the day.

God has consecrated this idea in my heart lately.

It’s easy to give God the best when things look good. Last year, I wrote about this same idea but I was in a very different season of life. I was living the dream. Everything was going right. I had zero complaints.

But this year has been a different story. It’s been hard. And at times, I’ve felt hopeless. All I’ve been able to see on most days is that we are out of wine at the wedding and I’m not sure filling waterspouts is going to do anything except waste time, water and energy.

But in the last month or so, God has arrested my heart. He’s asked me to just simply do what He asks and trust Him, just like Mary and those servants did at the wedding.

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson has a new TV show out and one of his favorite lines in that show is,

“All I want is all you’ve got.”

The Rock is onto something there. That’s all God wants to.

When we bring Him our best efforts, He does amazing things with them. He turns water into wine. He saves the day.

Think about those servants. How do you think their faith was impacted when they saw God bless their best efforts? I know when I remember God’s faithfulness in my life, I walk out on the other side stronger than ever. Why? I’ve seen yet again how powerful God is, and how true His promises are.

Whatever you’re doing today, fill it to the brim. Do it like you’re doing it for Jesus. Even if it feels ridiculous. Even if it fills like a waste. Do it, and do it well.

It’s important to note that the waterpots Jesus asked the servants to fill were heavy. It would have likely taken at least two people for every pot, if not more.

If you have a writing project God has asked you to fill it to the brim on and you need a little help with that, join me tomorrow for Winning at Writing Projects: A 7-day email course for writers.

It all starts TOMORROW! This free email course that will help you win at writing. No matter where you are in your project, it will help get you a few steps further in your process.

You will get seven jam-packed emails from me, along with access to a private Facebook group and one-on-one access to me for consultations for your individual projects. 

Registrations ends TODAY. This will never be free again, so don’t miss out! Sign up here. 

“Do you love people enough that you are willing to be put in the fire for them?”

Chances are, you have a memory of something you were dared to do that probably wasn’t very smart. 

Maybe it was a dare to jump off a cliff into shallow water in the dark, or to sneak onto the roof of the neighbor’s house. 

I found myself in this position often and to be honest, my answer more often than not was “YES!” Why? Because I’m an Enneagram 3 and we will always rise to the challenge out of our desperate need to impress the people around us with our performances. 

When I was a kid, there was a TV show and one of the recent episodes had a scene where a bunch of high school kids had been dared to walk over hot coals. I don’t remember the show, or the reason for this scene. I just remember my friends thought it would be a great idea to re-enact it. I took my shoes and socks off. I was ready to make this thing happen and be the hero of my friend group. 

(Side note: If you feel you need to do stupid things to impress your friends so they will like you, find new friends.)

As the coals heated up and I saw the red ember around the coals, I heard a little whisper of logic in my head. And then as I started to put my left foot into the first step, it hurt enough for me to decide maybe this wasn’t a good challenge to “rise” to. 

It’s a good thing logic won that night because that probably would have burned my feet really bad, and there was no real purpose to walking across fire. 

A friend of mine asked me a question a few months ago that has kept me awake at night more times than I can count.

“Do you love people enough that you are willing to be put in the fire for them?”

He was referring to the dream God has placed on my heart. The one to help people find confidence in who they are as children of God so they can be all He has created and called them to be. 

Like when I was an overly-confident 15-year-old idiot, my answer is a quick and confident,


But then as I get closer to the fire and the soles of my feet start to feel the heat, I start to listen to logic again. 

As I begin to get disappointed or feel the burn of haters or see the effects of failure, it’s easy to convince myself that stepping into the fire is a bad idea. I start to listen to the voice of reason. The voice that tells me I can help people some other way. I can honor God and love His people, no matter what I do with my days. That I should play it safe.

But see, that’s not the deal God made with me. He said, “Get in the fire if you really want to help people.” 

Making a decision to get in the fire is asking for the heat. It’s going to hurt. It’s going to be hard. It’s going to be uncomfortable. 

But you know what will happen every single time you and I choose to get in the fire to fulfill what God has for us? We will get stronger. Our stories will get better. The ways in which we can help people will become brighter. 

The fire is absolutely worth it. I don’t want to do God’s plan for my life any other way, especially not the logical one that makes sense. That’s not God’s way.

So I think it’s time I stop losing sleep over my friend’s question. I’m running right into the fire. 

Do you really want to help people?

Do you want to help people badly enough that you’re willing to get in the fire for them?

Because you will. God will use that fire to refine you and mold you into the version of you He will use to help the people you’re meant to serve. 

And every time you start to lose faith and try to get out of the fire before it’s your time, it will be all that much more painful to step back into the fire. It’s better if we choose to walk into the flames with confidence and the resolve that we’re going to stay there for the duration.

I talked earlier this week about how being in the fire with Jesus is the safest place for you to be.  Check that post out here. 

If getting into the fire for you means getting started (again) on a writing project, join me Monday (July 22) for Winning at Writing Projects: A 7-day email course for writers.

We will cover big ideas, practical steps and lots more. No matter where you are in your process, I guarantee there will be something for you to learn to get you a few steps from where you are. 

It’s completely free but it will never be free again so don’t miss out on this opportunity. Sign up TODAY. 

What you will get:

  • An email from me everyday next week (July 22-29) with ideas on writing, including practical steps to move along in your process and things I actually do in my own writing process. 
  • Access to a private Facebook community where we can all learn from and encourage one another through the week and beyond. 
  • One-on-one access with me if you have specific questions or need help getting unstuck on your personal projects. 
  • An invitation to give me constructive feedback at the end of the course so I can continually enhance this course for others after you.

Registration ends in 24 hours on July 21 at 11:59 CST, and the first email goes out on Monday. I’ll see you there!

Day 14 of 730. 716 blog posts to go!

Stop wasting time.

I have been more aware of some startling things on the Internet lately.

Do you know how much time people spend arguing with strangers on the Internet about politics and religion? Or filling up community Facebook pages with complaints about every single solitary thing they can think of? Or taking pointless quizzes and playing games? Or rambling on about how terrible their lives are and how all of their problems are unsolvable?

It’s actually really sad to me how much precious time people waste when they could be creating something new and productive.

What do online arguments accomplish? Nothing

What do pointless games and quizzes accomplish? Nothing.

What do complaints accomplish? Nothing

Absolutely nothing.

MILLIONS of people are wasting what precious hours a day they have on doing absolutely nothing every single day.

And for every moment they waste, we are losing out on their contributions to the world. Millions of books, blogs, podcasts, songs, software applications, photographs, artwork, businesses, nonprofits, talks and other masterpieces are never created each year because people are wasting their time arguing on Twitter and complaining on Facebook.

What a waste.

What if we did our part to stitch the world back together by putting our time and creative energy into something that actually mattered?

Join me Monday for a FREE email course that will help you win at writing. No matter where you are in your project, this 7-day course will help get you a few steps further in your process. I dare you to say yes.

You will get seven jam-packed emails from me, along with access to a private Facebook group and one-on-one access to me for consultations for your individual projects.

Registrations ends in TWO days. This will never be free again. Don’t miss out! Sign up here.

Day 13 of 730. 717 blog posts to go!

The safest place to be in this world is in the fire with Jesus.

Let’s talk about fire today.

Here’s some context about Daniel 3. King Nebuchadnezzar was the king of Babylon, which had taken over Jerusalem. They had acquired all the Israelites, but the king had the bright idea to not let a good thing go to waste so he scoured the Israelites for the brightest Jews to bring back with him to his place in Babylon. That’s how Daniel was discovered.

Daniel was chosen because he could interpret the king’s dreams. He went from a slave in captivity in Jerusalem to sitting at the king’s table in Babylon overnight. But then he recruits three of his buddies and they get to come along for the ride as well.

Everything was going well. King Nebuchadnezzar liked these boys. Things were good.

But there’s always some haters. The powers to be went to the king one day and informed him the three boys weren’t bowing down to this giant statue made of gold in the center of Babylon as the king had ordered. He called the boys in and I imagine he tried to coax them into it a little bit. The bible doesn’t tell us all the side conversation here but I just like to believe Nebuchadnezzar was like, “Listen guys, I like you all. Just do what you’re supposed to do. Bend a knee to the statue and keep the peace or I’m going to have to make an example out of you.”

One of my favorite moments in all of scripture happens in Daniel 3:18

Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego replied to the king, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to give you an answer concerning this matter. If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the furnace of blazing fire; and He will deliver us out of your hand, O king. But even if He does not, let it be known to you, O king, that we are not going to serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up.


I love their confidence. They loved the king. He had given them so much, but they understood that he could take everything from them except Jesus.

Nebuchadnezzar was obviously an Enneagram 8 and saw this as a challenge. He told his people to fire up the furnace and actually told them to turn it up seven times hotter than usual, just to add insult to injury.

Come on guys, you know those boys were scared. It doesn’t matter how confident they were, they had to be questioning what on earth they were giving up.

But have you ever heard that voice in your head that just tells you to “keep the peace?” It’s tempting to protect all you’ve worked for – whether it be reputation, relationships, resources, etc., especially if all you have to do is blend in and follow the rules.

The boys were thrown into the fire. And God didn’t put the fire out.

If you stop there, it sounds like a pretty depressing story. It sounds like God forgot about them. He left them hanging.

But then….

There was a fourth person in the fire.


Jesus never says we won’t walk into fire. In John 16:33, He tells us,

“These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.”

Instead, Jesus meets the boys in the fire. And while He warns us that we WILL have tribulations in this life, He also assures us that He will always meet us in the fire.

What if Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego had decided to bend a knee and do what the king they actually respected told them to do? They had everything they could ever need or want. They were “set” for life.

They would have missed out on meeting Jesus.

Too many God-given dreams are thwarted because we get a little success and then we spend the rest of our lives making compromises and trying to protect it.

What if we all lived our lives like the three boys did? Where we were unafraid and unashamed to put God first every single time? Where no amount of success or privilege was tempting enough to compromise on the reverence and love we should hold for only God?

Most likely, you aren’t bowing down to golden statues, but maybe you’re so engrossed in Instagram in the mornings, you miss the sunrise. Or maybe you are obsessed with finding a spouse that you’ve stopped relentlessly chasing after God’s heart. Or maybe you want to build you business so bad that you have forsaken His kingdom.

More than at any other time in history, we are bombarded with people, things and ideas that are keeping us from being exactly where God wants us. When we follow God, we choose to be thrown into the fiery furnace.

The safest place in this world for you and I to be is in the fire with Jesus.

If God has given you a calling, playing it safe and not being willing to fight for that dream might as well be a slap in the face. His plan for your life involves fire. Dreams take work. Work means trials and tribulations.

Fiery furnaces create champions. You will always be stronger for what you’ve been through.

The story He is writing through you is yours. It’s time to own it. Take some risk and step into the fire to meet Jesus. He’s waiting for you.

Is the calling God has placed on your life a writing project? Join me next week (July 22-29) for Winning at Writing Projects: A 7-day email course for writers.

We will cover big ideas, practical steps and lots more. No matter where you are in your process, I guarantee there will be something for you to learn to get you a few steps from where you are.

It’s completely free but it will never be free again so don’t miss out on this opportunity. Sign up TODAY.

What you will get:

  • An email from me everyday next week (July 22-29) with ideas on writing, including practical steps to move along in your process and things I actually do in my own writing process. 
  • Access to a private Facebook community where we can all learn from and encourage one another through the week and beyond. 
  • One-on-one access with me if you have specific questions or need help getting unstuck on your personal projects. 
  • An invitation to give me constructive feedback at the end of the course so I can continually enhance this course for others after you.

Registration ends on July 21 at 11:59 CST, and the first email goes out on Monday. I’ll see you there!

Day 12 of 730 – 718 blog posts to go!

Never give up.

Never. Give. Up.

Five months ago, I was disappointed because my coach said made me take a break for a few days from the gym while I saw a cardiologist and had a few tests run.

A few days turned into a few weeks. A few weeks turned into a few months. A few months turned into almost half a year.

Don’t think for a minute that disappointment ever left me. I tried to sugarcoat it. I tried to stay positive, trust God and respect the process. But really, I was always just really disappointed.

The timing sucked. Coach and I had just discussed a new season in my fitness journey that week and I was on fire and ready to take on all kinds of new goals. I even posted a blog post about it the same day my health went sideways. Check it out here.

I felt like a racehorse that just left the gate, only to hit a mud pit 20 yards in. Every step took more effort than the last. I felt like I was going nowhere fast.

I had a coach who wouldn’t let me give up. He made me keep getting up everyday and doing whatever the next step is. The next appointment. The next test. Rest, nutrition and water in-between.

I spent the majority of these last five months not worried about my health and safety at all. I was worried about one thing, and one thing only. My active lifestyle. I went into every appointment and begged every doctor to give me a clearance letter. I even convinced two doctors to give them to me, even though I clearly was in no shape to resume normal activity.

I was frustrated for most of this season because I wanted to do what I wanted to do, and I wanted to do it yesterday.

I finally got the test I needed last week and got a diagnosis this morning.

Can I tell you guys something?

I’m incredibly glad we never gave up. Returning to my active lifestyle is going to be so much more fun now, not having to worry about all the things it could have been. Not only that, but how much more gratifying is a reward you have to wait for?

I now have a diagnosis, with a treatment plan and a guarantee I’ll get back to SAFELY living my very best active lifestyle in a matter of weeks and feel good doing it.

So today, I have two very simple things to say.

  1. Have people in your corner who won’t let you give up on what really matters. It can be your spouse, best friend, neighbor, pastor, boss, a mentor, a parent or your physical therapist. It really doesn’t matter who it is. But just find some people who won’t just go with whatever you want to do, but will challenge you to invest in what really matters.
  2. Never give up. Doesn’t matter how many hours or dollars you feel like you have wasted. Trust the process one more time. I talk about not giving up on your goals a lot, but make sure you’re not giving up on reaching your goals THE RIGHT WAY. Don’t cut corners. You’ll miss the journey, and you might not even end up at your intended destination.

I’m an author and an athlete, so sometimes I write about fitness stuff. What’s your writing goal? Book? Blog? Business plan? Website? Sermon? Screenplay? Regardless of what it is, I want to help. You still have until a few more days to join the Winning at Writing e-course. No matter where you are on your writing project, you’ll get practical steps to take you a little further in your process.

What you will get:

  • An email from me everyday next week (July 22-29) with ideas on writing, including practical steps to move along in your process and things I actually do in my own writing process.
  • Access to a private Facebook community where we can all learn from and encourage one another through the week and beyond.
  • One-on-one access with me if you have specific questions or need help getting unstuck on your personal projects.
  • An invitation to give me constructive feedback at the end of the course so I can continually enhance this course for others after you.

It’s completely free, but it will never be free again. You know what that means? Get signed up. Now.

Sign up here.

Day 11 of 730. 719 to go!

It’s time to win at writing.

If you’re anything like me, you have a bunch of big dreams and hustle. I keep finding myself in the crosshairs of ideas and clarity. 

You know what happens when I find myself there?

I freeze. 

Perfectionism overwhelms me. The wrong voice wins. And instead of reaching my audience with the great content I’ve produced, it sits in a folder on my desktop that might as well be named “Great content nobody will ever see.” 

I recently took a time audit on how much time I spend writing with the intention for people to see it. I found out some startling statistics. For every 45 hours I spend writing, someone else sees 750 words of content. That’s ridiculous. 

And the saddest takeaway from that data is that it proves I don’t believe in my own message enough to practice what I preach. 

My brand is theoretically based on confidence and authenticity. 

Except I don’t share the authentic content I come up with from a place of confidence. 

So how can I expect you – my audience – to be inspired to pursue all you have been created and called to be with confidence because of my story if I won’t share my story with you?

In a recent conversation with my editor, we discussed that I don’t share content because once I hit send/publish, I lose control of another piece of my heart. 


That’s the problem. 

Actually, if I’m honest, the real issue is the ILLUSION of control. 

See? I’ve spent my life having very little control of most things. So how do I cope with that? I give myself the illusion of control. 

I have convinced myself that I can still make people believe the narrative that I write great content as long as they never actually see it. I control the perception. I also convince myself that all my ideas are incredible ideas because I haven’t kicked them out there to see if they fly yet. 

Guys, I know how stupid this sounds. Trust me. 

I also know that if we are all honest, I’m not the only one. 

How many of you are out there not living in the middle of your God-given dream because you’re afraid that if you release whatever it is inside of you to the world, you will no longer have control over it. You’re afraid of the criticism, the rejection, the failure. 

So what if we jump off the cliff together? The world needs our ideas. The world needs to see us hustle after our dreams. The world needs our blog posts, songs, podcasts, videos, DIY projects, recipes, online courses, businesses, books, designs, inventions or whatever other awesome content we have to bring to the table. 

The world needs it. But so do you and I. For instance, I know I was created to write books and run races. It’s the passions God gave me to do my part to stitch the world back together. You have your own passions. If we aren’t living in the fullness of pursuing what sets our souls on fire, we aren’t living in the full capacity of the dreams God gave us. We aren’t stewarding what we have been given well. We aren’t honoring Him. We aren’t doing our part to sow into His kingdom. 

So how do we do that? How do we surrender the illusion of control?

We get quiet with and listen to our Creator. Find your version of a prayer closet. For me, somewhere outside with my ear buds in, listening to worship music. I get a bottle of water. I close my eyes and I just let God talk to me. That’s an important step. I believe we miss so much in prayer because we spend all the time talking. I try to spend intentional time in silence, solitude and surrender with Father God and let Him just love me. 

We tap into the best version of ourselves. Find whatever it is that makes you better. For me, it’s consistent personal, professional and spiritual development. I read and listen to a lot from people who are doing the things I want to do. I can’t be the best version of myself by myself. I purposefully surround myself with people who force me to be better than I think I am capable of. It all started a few years back when I started calling them “Team Felicia” but it stuck. Team Felicia loves me exactly where I am but too much to let me stay here. They refuse to let me settle for good enough. They daily remind me that mediocrity is selfish. 

We spend time planning things with specificity. Get a notebook out and write the plan down. I sat down this morning with my notebook (I use Evernote). Right now, my main project is just to post a new blog post every day for 730 days. That’s a lot of new blog post topics, and I’m already feeling the pressure of running out of ideas on Day 10. This morning, I created an editorial calendar for my blog for the next thirty days along with some minor projects I want to throw out to the world and see what happens. My plan may change as time goes on, but at least I won’t find myself at a loss for ideas on any given day. 

We celebrate when we win. Most likely, your goal is YOUR goal. If it isn’t, let’s find a new goal you are actually passionate about. When you create your own goals, you’re the boss. That means you get to decide what counts and how to celebrate it. During my 730 day blog challenge, I am celebrating every published blog post with an X on my calendar. It’s a little thing, but I love streaks, and then I get to watch the data roll in from my website and all my social media profiles as I watch that content find its way onto screens of people everywhere. I celebrate certain analytics with a cup of my favorite coffee from Honest Roasters, or with an hour by the pool, listening to an audiobook. It doesn’t matter how you celebrate your win, just make sure you do. It’s one of the most important things you will do. It’s not enough to just celebrate the beginning or the end. You have to keep the momentum up in the middle. That’s where it really counts. 

I want to invite you to join me for a 7-day email course all about winning at your writing projects. I know the process can be tricky to get started or to know exactly how to make a plan.

This course is only seven days long and will take you a few steps down the road from wherever you are. We will cover the basics of how to win at writing like finding what to write about, more focused time to write, how to get your content in front of more people and so much more.

It’s completely free, but registration ends Sunday, July 21 at 11:59 CST. Sign up here and the first email will come at you Monday, July 22.

Once you’re signed up, be sure to join the private Facebook community (you’ll get an email with the link after you sign up), and introduce yourself.

This is the ONLY time this course will ever be free. It’ll cost you real dollars next time so don’t miss out, and make sure to invite your friends to join you too because doing things with friends is more fun!

Day 10 of 730. 720 days to go!

Simple Gratitude #1

Sometimes, I just want to say thank you.

Here’s my simple gratitude list for today:

I’m in awe and wonder of a God that loves me infinitely more than I can even imagine. That not only sent His son to take my place on the cross and rise again for me, but also left me with Holy Spirit and longs for relationship with me. One of my favorite characteristics about God right now is His creativity. Looking around, I’m just infatuated with how beautiful the world around me is, and that He created it for no other real purpose other than for us to enjoy looking at the world we live.

I’m on my knees in gratitude for my community. I don’t even know where they all come from but there are so many people who love me so deeply, so truly. People I can laugh with and cry with. People I can lean on. People who have my back even when I don’t know it, and who will fight for me in ways I don’t even know to ask for.

I’m beyond words for the beauty of my story. And that my past doesn’t have to be my future. That I get to transform the pain into a huge purpose to reach and inspire others facing the same lies I had to kick in the teeth.

I’m also thankful for sunsets, dogs, fresh vegetables, coffee, freedom, technology, air conditioning, writing, worship music and nurses who can put an IV in like a champion.

Gratitude will change your life every time. If you need a shift in perspective this week, stop and think of three things you’re thankful for. I promise that it will change things.

What are you thankful for today?

Day 9 of my 730 day blog challenge.

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